A Friend Killed Himself

I just found out today. A man I hardly knew, yet considered a good friend took his life on September 9th. Richard Houghton, better known to us at PAX as Shoun. Shoun was in charge of expo hall Enforcers at PAX. He had been an Enforcer since the beginning of PAX This was the first year I really worked with him and really just started getting to know him.

The weird thing is all of this emotion I'm feeling. I hardly knew him yet I feel like I've lost a good friend or a family member. I've had friends and family die from age or sickness, and had my time of grief. This is something that, God, is for the lack of a better word, weird. This is the first person I ever knew personally that took their own life.

And the fact that what I did see of him and know of him was the he was a cool guy. Great humor, easy going, helpful........yet nothing to indicate that he was unhappy or suicidal.

Grief

Shock

Confusion

Sadness

I feel all these and more.

I don't understand why. Why he did it. That's probably the biggest thing that stands out, why.